


My Sanity Is Fading

by Nerdymetalhead



Category: non fandom
Genre: Dystopian, I really want to dive deep into insanity, Original Story - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-08 16:21:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20838464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerdymetalhead/pseuds/Nerdymetalhead
Summary: Journal entries from someone living in an odd time on Earth. These entries slowly unravel into insane ramblings that will leave more questions than answers.





	My Sanity Is Fading

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all, I am new to using AO3 so let me figure this out. This is the first piece in a small collection of short journal entries, I know it's not the most interesting concept but I hope you will like it. I will be working on moving some of my other works to here as well, so if you want more then just wait. Anyways, without further ado, here is My Sanity Is Fading.

Page 1  
Day 1  
The sun is a monster. I cannot look at the gigantic floating orb in the orange sky. It’s rays kill those who step into them during the daytime. My only escape is the night, the dark cool night. The dark sky is freedom, the dark sky is life, the dark sky does not kill.  
I cannot remember my life before now. The days before the wasteland filled with sand. The days before I lied in wait before moving for food. Those days are too far behind me to remember. The hellscape is my only memory. This hellscape will be my only memory…  
This journal will be my last contact to whoever is out there. This book will hold my memories, this book will be my savior. The leather on the outside cover is ripped and torn it may be worse when the next person finds this, but I hope my words of insanity… no my cries of help… will be read. There is no escape. There will never be any escape. No escape. NO ESCAPE. I HAVE TRIED AND FAILED TO END THIS MISERABLE EXISTENCE. I HAVE FOUND. NO. WAY. OUT. THERE IS NO WAY OUT. NO FUCKING WAY OUT. 

Page 2  
Day 4  
Days and nights pass by, but I cannot tell what day it is. I cannot tell the year for that matter. All traces of the old society that I may have been a part of have been deleted. Destroyed. Erased. There is no knowledge from old books left for me to entertain myself with. There is not a single bit of the old world for me to try and look for.  
An odd thing happened to me a few days ago. I was followed. I don’t know what was following me, but I’m certain I was being followed. It did not seem to want to kill me, it just watched. I may need to start keeping my eyes open during my sleep. Or I could just sleep, wait for the thing to kill me in my sleep. I could be let loose of this hell. I could finally die.  
I can only imagine the day when I’ll finally find a companion. This agonizing loneliness is killing me in a way that I cannot aptly describe with a pen. I have not felt loneliness as far back as my memory can go back to. It’s a feeling that I have come to despise. A feeling that I wish not to feel anymore. I cannot imagine how long I can go on with this feeling. 

Page 3  
Day 7  
The follower is close. I can tell. The noises of breathing are closer, not mine for once. I wish to have this follower accompany me. I cannot imagine it feels to only be able to follow me and not speak. To not communicate to the person it is following. If I invite it then maybe I can have a companion. I can have something to talk to other than this journal.  
I may have found the first bit of old world knowledge. It is a book, with all the page filled with writing. The title on the cover is worn, too faint to even read but the inside page reads I Have No Mouth & I Must Scream. That is an odd title. A title that does not make sense to me. What does it mean? What kind of knowledge does this book hold?  
There must be a lure for the thing that is following me. I must find what it is. I need to. My mind cannot take the constant silences that come with the lonely world. I must find someone to talk to. This is insanity. Whatever God that is watching over me right now is an evil deity. A sadistic evil deity who only wishes to watch me suffer slowly over time. I want some kind of escape. I need an escape. 

Page 4  
Day 10  
The follower is gone. I cannot tell where it has gone off to. There is no trace of whatever it was following me anymore. The closest thing I had to a companion is gone. DAMN EVERYTHING ON THIS MISERABLE PLANET THAT IS ALIVE. DAMN EVERYTHING. DAMN. IT. DAMN IT.  
I am losing my sanity as I write in this journal. I cannot escape my dark thoughts as I sit here underneath shade waiting for the sun to leave the sky. I am allowing my mind’s darkness to overtake me every second of every day that I continue to live. I can only hope for death now.


End file.
